Beyond the Push Gift: What She Really Needs Before Birthing Your Baby
Jan 28, 2022"My wife is about to deliver our baby and I wanted something nice for her when she got home."
This was a sweet note left by a partner who purchased a set of four in-home postpartum massages for his wife online.
I love this on two levels:
Firstly, that this partner is looking for a way to honor his wife as she carries their baby, and secondly, that he’s proactively looking for support for her AFTER she gives birth.
You’ve probably heard of, or perhaps even received a push gift. You may have have even given yourself permission to receive prenatal massage during pregnancy, but did you plan for some POSTpartum nurturance and care?
Planned is the key word here. Were you able to anticipate your own needs, or did you succumb to pain, exhaustion, or irritability before you reached out for help?
Be honest. It’s ok. Many, if not most new moms, don’t.
The tide, however, is beginning to turn in favor of normalizing postpartum support. We have books like Kimberly Ann Johnson’s “The Fourth Trimester,” to thank in large part for that. If you haven’t read it, I highly recommend it. Kimberly eloquently describes why and how we can support new moms after birth.
This note above from that thoughtful partner really illustrated this to me. I literally want to hug this man. Just reach through the computer and hug him, because, well, he gets it. His wife, and by default his child, will benefit from massage (along with rest, nurturing foods, and loving support) for years to come!
I often get asked, “how soon can I get a postpartum massage?”
My answer is, if you’ve had an uncomplicated Vaginal birth, you can get a massage as soon as you want. Even the day of, or day after labor (although I’d a house-call, so you don’t have to leave your nest).
If you’ve had a complicated birth, including a C-section, then my answer is, it depends on what your care-giver advises.
We ask your doctor or midwife if there needs to be any limitations or modifications to receiving massage. Sometimes there is, but often, there isn’t. We’ve even worked with clients 2-days post C-section (with permission) to help move the excess fluids from her body after receiving lots of IV’s and medications at the hospital.
I hope you encourage any pregnant people in your life to save some planning and resources for the precious post-partum period.
If you’ve ever heard the expression “Forty days for forty years,” it’s speaking to the fact that the care a post-birthing person receives for the first forty days after birth, can affect her health for the next forty years.
Let’s follow this loving partner’s example, and prioritize care for AFTER baby arrives too!
What do you say?
Sending love & light to you!
With gratitude,
Sparrow
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